jacquez45:

dsudis:

Thank you so much! I do sometimes enjoy the challenge of multi-partner sex choreography, it makes it such a fun physical puzzle, and I’m glad it worked for you! 😀

1. As for how to write sex scenes while being asexual… given the above, I assume you do enjoy reading (at least some) sex scenes, so–as with any other kind of writing that you find technically challenging, because sex scenes are really not mystically different from any other part of writing, I promise–the best way to learn to do it is to read it, and to look carefully at examples that you enjoy. Map out sex scenes that you consider successful/enjoyable/hot/etc. in as much detail as you need to–look at where the author talks about sensation, emotion, attraction, etc., and try to find a pattern that you can imitate.

2. For better and more thorough advice, check out @resonant8-blog‘s How to Write a Sex Scene (I find part 2, about finding the “zing” in a scene, particularly helpful). 

3. Accept that sometimes it just sounds like a weird boring list of actions because that is how one’s own writing sounds when you’re having difficulty with it. This is actually not a uniquely asexual-writer-writing-a-sex-scene affliction: this happens to literally everybody writing sex scenes at least some of the time.

The most important thing I ever figured out in writing sex scenes is that there is no way to make sexiness be inherent in the words. Sexiness happens in the reader’s brain, and when you are focused on making the words, getting the sexiness to happen in your own brain is like trying to tickle yourself. It’s probably not going to happen. 

But if you have set up characters and a situation and activities that a reader is going to find sexy, the sexiness will happen in their brain when they read it even if your words aren’t perfect, so just try to describe it clearly (including sensations/emotions/attraction, where applicable) and get out of the way. 

And if in doubt, find someone to test-read it for you, and ask them to tell you honestly if at some point they found it mechanical or boring; if they did, you can work on fixing the scene, because, again, a sex scene is like any other kind of writing: it is not magic, it is not dependent on your own sexual experience any more than writing fight scenes requires you to be a black belt, and you will only get better at writing it through practice and feedback.

For me, writing sex scenes as an ace person got a lot easier when I realized that I’m ace, and that there was a reason why I didn’t really want to connect what I was writing with my own experiences or my own body. When I stopped flinching from that, writing sex just turned out to be fun, like any other intense/dramatic encounter between characters. So if all else fails, embrace that you are writing characters doing an exciting and enjoyable thing that you don’t innately understand, and just, you know, run with it. 😀

re: point 1. I would also maybe look at ones that seem extra-boring, as well as ones that work. There are some authors whose stories I love generally but whose sex scenes I always skim because boooooooooring, and other authors who I don’t like generally but who I will skim for context until I get to the sex scenes because they’re amazing at that. And the thing is, other people find the stuff I find boring really works for them? But understanding what YOU are looking for in a scene that you like or don’t like is important. For example, some people really enjoy a kind of explicit detail that I find offputting and mechanical. I like sensation and emotion, and some people find that not super sexy. Understanding what doesn’t work (FOR YOU, as a storyteller and as a reader) will help — as an author, I found it a lot easier to write sex scenes with a balance of visual/mechanical detail AND sensation/emotion once I understood where my lines were about those things, and where I get put off by mechanics vs where I can used mechanics to support what I actually care about.

The Australian Parliament has voted in favour of the marriage equality bill. Joy, relief, hope, happiness at being a citizen of a country who in this area has chosen fairness to everyone.

mcicioni-blog:

I will SO be late for brunch, but how can I miss a chance to waffle on about my latest passionate obsession????

What do they do for work? In canon, nothing, because they are seeking revenge from the same four people. In my wip, they get jobs with a small stagecoach company in New Mexico.

Who is better at navigating? Ryan, although Bill is not too bad.

Who is better at charming the townspeople? Neither, really. At a pinch, Ryan is marginally less hopeless.

Who gets them run out of town? Both, because they both have a tendency to shoot villains dead.

Who makes coffee? In canon, almost certainly Ryan. In my wip, Bill, because he finds Ryan’s coffee too weak.

Who chops wood? They take turns. Both sort of believe in fairness.

Who is better at cooking? Ryan, both in canon and in my wip.

Do they smoke? Ryan does (a pipe). Bill doesn’t, but doesn’t object to the pipe.

Who is better at taking care of injuries? Ryan (he’s more experienced). Re. Bill, no spoilers for my wip.

How do they deal with being sick? Both are typical Stoic Western Heroes (the “ain’t nothin wrong with me” school)

Who wants to go swimming when they come across a stream? Bill might be tempted, if Ryan manages to get him to admit it. And he would be a strong swimmer.

Who is better with horses? Do the horses have names? Bill is marginally better. His horse probably has a name, but I haven’t thought about it yet.

What changes when they realize they have feelings for each other? In canon, nothing (deep tearful sigh). In my stories, Bill rides back to El Viento. They are Stoic Western Men and therefore say very little, it’s all in the looks and touches.

Are they open about their relationship? Neither says one word about it, but they ride together, take jobs together and live together in a shack with one room and one bed. I believe that each thinks of the other first and foremost as a friend.

Big spoon/ little spoon? Ryan is the big spoon, although he is slightly shorter than Bill.

How do they deal with being apart? Easily, both in canon and in my stories, because each has been a total loner until they met. When apart, they do what they have to do quickly and competently, and think of the other while they are having breaks.

Settling down? In canon, each of them probably wanders alone until the end of his days (deep sigh). In my stories, they do, but they probably would not call it “settling down”. They’d call it something like “gettin an honest job”.

Tagging: nobody, because all the significant people have already been tagged by @bleak-nomads (who has all my gratitude for giving me this chance).

Oops. Sincere apologies to @sexymonstersupercreep, @clinteastwood-blog and @shadowvalkyrie.